Answers sold here, a quarter a piece

Posted by james on May 31, 2003

I feel like I'm in the place I always hate, the place where I always know the answer. It's not that I wouldn't like knowing all the answers (that might be handy sometimes), but I believe it's something I can't attain. So when I find myself trying to dole out answers, I'm on shaky ground.

I have this very strong fear of being wrong. At least, I think I do. It's actually pretty hard to tell, looking at it from the inside. But before it used to prevent me from ever voicing my opinions on things. Now, I've found out how to believe in my own opinions and share them with other people. But I think somewhere in the process, I forgot how to say "I don't know." Because I really don't. I may have insight, may be able to think in different ways. But I can't peer into anyone's soul and so I never know for sure. But I can't give up sharing what I feel.

So I'm left trying to find a balance between hiding my light under a basket (basically, letting whatever talents and abilities I may have go to waste) and becoming arrogant (believing that somehow I am special, important, and I know what other people can't). I'm also starting to think my definition of arrogance may need some revision...