Dell wants me to have Carpal Tunnel

Posted by james on Feb. 24, 2004

<i>For those of you who have never seen images from a computer screen when you close your eyes, this rant is not for you</i>

It's serious. Dell really does want me to have <a href="">Carpal Tunnel syndrome</a>. This is when your wrist gets mad at you for abusing it (ie. using a keyboard or mouse too much) and decides to hurt you, a lot. I don't have it yet, and I'm very careful about it since I know at some point I'll probably push myself too far. But the mouse is the worst part, without a mouse people would probably get a good 5 or 6 more years out of their hands, before they have to trade them in for new ones.

So a very good thing is keyboard shortcuts. Press 1 key, 2 key, a 3rd and bang, my email appears. 1 key, 2 key, bang the internet pops up. Now go to my laptop. Press 1 key... except THERE IS NO ONE KEY! The Windows key, that little flag thing that is a international symbol of <a href="">evil</a>, is missing on my new laptop. It used to be by the spacebar, one of the easiest places to reach. Now it's on the top-right corner of the keyboard... where you'll never accidentally press it, because you never press <b>anything</b> on the top-right corner.

So thank you Dell. You've taken something that makes me faster, more efficient, stronger, and an all-around slightly more amicable person, and made me the worst of all things in the computer world; slow.

Plus, in ten years my hands will be all bundled up like that sidekick from GTA3. Who apparently never got his hands fixed, the whole game. If that happened to me, I'd say screw it and get my hands replaced by <a href="">sharp blades</a>. Or a <a href="">chainsaw</a>. Mmm...